First panel of a Christmas cartoon strip by Alexander Shen.
Dave Barry's Holiday Gift Guide (including the Hug Me Pillow).
Monstrous Nutcracker by Jared Deal for the Vinyl Toy Network.
Win a Chuckanuka.
Lemony Snicket gives holiday advice. For example:
Dear Mr. Snicket: Why does it always have to be coal? Why shouldn't a concerned parent give their ill-behaved youngsters something more accessible for modern times, say, a stick of firewood or a dried lump of mud?
Dear Woody: Under enough pressure, a lump of coal may eventually become a diamond, but a stick of firewood, in the hands of an ill-behaved youngster under pressure from a concerned parent, invariably becomes a prop in a nice rousing game of Joan of Arc. Does anyone smell something burning?
"How to receive the gift of the Holy Spirit" by George Otis. Via.
Tortured gingerbread man cookie cutter.
Reindeer paper toy.
Triforce tree topper.
*Buy Santa Claus toys at eBay.