.@TSA passenger screening canine Messi alerts on his last bag before retiring. And then he is showered with dozens of his favorite toys as his retirement celebration kicks off at @Reagan_Airport this morning. pic.twitter.com/aMyqa2zd4s
— Lisa Farbstein, TSA Spokesperson (@TSA_Northeast) April 19, 2024
What side do you choose?
— Daman Rangoola (@damanr) April 19, 2024
Do you choose the mom-and-pop shop generational small business or the trillionaire oligarchs from Denver?
Do you choose the NBA legend on potentially his last hurrah or the chunky European invader who doesn't even like basketball who has taken the… pic.twitter.com/VoDpudUzyc
NBC will display the heart rates of parents watching their kids during the Olympics https://t.co/ewREeKHAAe pic.twitter.com/MLbRQFZVbf
— Awful Announcing (@awfulannouncing) April 19, 2024
if you have a space like this, you eventually stop going upstairs and just sleep on the couches. soon you go upstairs so rarely that weird spiritual energy pools up there. very difficult to dissipate. starts to feel like a forbidden zone. ominous. its not yours. few discuss this. https://t.co/DZpfNfifFd
— owen cyclops (@owenbroadcast) April 18, 2024
TIL that in the 50s there was a company that specialized in contracting out professional midget welders that could crawl into small pipelines to perform internal fixes. https://t.co/mnnUAeNOSy
— John Carmack (@ID_AA_Carmack) March 11, 2024
the longest second is the one between pressing enter when you know you mistyped your password and being able to type it again
— Joe Wintergreen (@joewintergreen) March 8, 2024
when I met my husband, I said I lived in Brooklyn even though I actually lived in Connecticut, and he said he lived in Brooklyn even though he was really just visiting from Minnesota. But against all odds we came together bc we shared a fundamental value. Lying
— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) March 12, 2024
was talking to my dad and he told me when he was 20 he did too many shrooms before work and “called in evil” he said he thought he was evil and couldn’t come into work
— dirt girl (@haterofwords2) March 10, 2024
just remembered my old roommate included this description of me in his review of the always pan pic.twitter.com/CsfOTQEIMH
— rex (@oldredtree) March 12, 2024
i told my mom to text me saying i needed to go home so i can show my manager and this was her message 😭 pic.twitter.com/HvXASjMfuM
— kim (@lunakimm) March 11, 2024
*More funny posts.