Tuesday, March 25, 2025

Today's news and jokes







UNREAL: DOJ's response to a federal appeals court judge saying that DOJ's argument would mean she could have been picked up and sent to a prison in El Salvador under Trump's order was not: "No, your honor," but rather, "That's not the record here."

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— Chris Geidner (@chrisgeidner.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 11:16 AM












Mistakenly including a "discredited so-called journalist" on your Signal chat group while discussing imminent war plans sounds worse, actually.

— cielbleuheidi.bsky.social (@cielbleuheidi.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 4:20 PM




Jeffrey Goldberg thinking he was being pranked and then realizing he was actually just in the war plans group chat is such a good microcosm of how it feels to be alive right now, everything seems fake until you realize it’s actually real and incredibly stupid

— Yell In a War (@jelenawoehr.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 3:03 PM


I signed an NDA SO I CAN WATCH A STUPID MARVEL SHOW jesus fucking christ

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— Kathryn VanArendonk (@kvanaren.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 3:03 PM


turning to the depiction of a more sober, mature time in US intelligence by rewatching BURN AFTER READING

— BeijingPalmer (@beijingpalmer.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 9:48 AM




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— Eric Ansley Díaz (@geekboyeric.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 8:27 PM








I was trying to realize why the Pohlads leveraging the Twins and leaving them with $400 million in debt felt so familiar. And then I realized: that's what they did with both the MTA Public Transit System *AND* with Eastern Airlines. All they know how to do is leave things in debt!

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— Peter Labuza (@labuzamovies.com) March 24, 2025 at 8:46 PM
("The [Twins have] more than $425 million in debt on the books, among highest of MLB teams")







the main concern is that with my genetic data the government can make a tiny clone of me that they can torture to get even more of my data

— wint (@dril.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 2:00 PM
A 23andMe write-up







nostalgia is remembering when you didn’t have to pay bills and attributing that feeling to mario

— Town Darling (@towndarling.bsky.social) March 22, 2025 at 5:59 PM


This is the broken-brained white American mythologizing that made a TV show called “Happy Days” that took place during Jim Crow.

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— Anil Dash (@anildash.com) March 23, 2025 at 8:51 AM


























Our National Security Advisor everyone.

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— Ed Markey (@edmarkey.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 11:44 AM
(If you really want a summary)







Jack Reacher is Alan Ritchson's outie

— post malone ergo propter malone (@proptermalone.bsky.social) March 23, 2025 at 3:12 PM








Now imagine my game yells BALATRO at you on startup but every person has a different pronunciation of Balatro depending on their user ID to sew chaos

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— localthunk (@localthunk.bsky.social) March 23, 2025 at 4:02 PM
I was stunned when I heard him pronounce the name on a podcast a few months ago







On Thursday, Mauricio Pochettino implicitly blamed the players. On Sunday, he backpedaled, in part because he surely knew: His USMNT honeymoon is over. His cute experiments are now baffling choices. Doubts are swirling — about the players, yes, but also about him. sports.yahoo.com/soccer/artic...

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— Henry Bushnell (@henrybushnell.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 10:05 AM
(There's a player by player breakdown: "Picked up right where he left off against Panama (not a compliment) and very little, if any, impact on the game. Attempted just 12 passes, created zero chances and reportedly waved off a substitution after his number went up on the board so he could take one last free kick.") (The ongoing free kick thing is demented. Like watching the coach's son get to take them against all sense)







What I like about this is that celebrities usually ask for privacy in public statements when they're announcing some kind of personal misfortune. (See also: the photo chosen for this story.)

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— Noel Murray (@noelmu.bsky.social) March 24, 2025 at 12:18 PM


Wikipedia































@getagripgolf #fyp #golftok #golf #dogs #family ♬ Rollin' (feat. Burna Boy) - MIST








@spongebob_trash Bought her a new bed but she prefers the cardboard 🙄#catsoftiktok #cattok #cats #fyp ♬ beans - yawn.








@brendaortega_

have to hold him down or else he jumps out the moving car

♬ Jelly Fish Jam - Techno Mix - Da Fokin




*More funny posts.