Today's news and jokes

finally the Odyssey adaptation we've all been waiting for

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— Christopher Livingston (@chrislivingston.bsky.social) July 21, 2026 at 12:44 PM

Link

By far the funniest moment in Homer’s Odyssey is when Circe says, “Shall we have sex?” and Odysseus says, “You just turned all my men into pigs. You have the GALL to think I would sleep with you? Of course I will. Absolutely. But don’t do any weird spells”

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— Boze the Library Owl (@sketchesbyboze.bsky.social) July 21, 2026 at 11:19 AM

I cannot stop laughing at this

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— Maris Kreizman (@maris.bsky.social) July 21, 2026 at 7:10 AM

Members of the Chinese Coast Guard and Philippine Navy clash with oars and sticks near the LST-542-class tank landing ship BRP Sierra Madre (LT-57), which was purposefully beached in 1999 on the disputed Second Thomas Shoal in the South China Sea. pic.twitter.com/0KEJRsLKcC

— OSINTdefender (@sentdefender) July 20, 2026

Chinese and Philippine naval forces clashed near the contested Second Thomas Shoal in the West Philippine Sea today.

Seen here, the crews of two small vessels beat each other with sticks and oars. pic.twitter.com/DAtlFxsS5R

— OSINTtechnical (@Osinttechnical) July 20, 2026

Just like the mountains

Graffiti removal set to begin at downtown LA's infamous "Graffiti towers," Mayor Bass says https://t.co/rKMHmA7y5q

— CBS LA (@CBSLosAngeles) July 21, 2026

There’s a lot in this look at Dacre’s legacy though tbh the line that struck me was a throwaway at the end, asserting: “About 40% of the Telegraph’s disproportionately male, affluent and elderly readers now live abroad.”

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— Jim Waterson (@jim.londoncentric.media) July 16, 2026 at 1:35 AM

I was recently in the middle of extremely fancy executives seriously discussing the new trend of going to “priestess training” (???) while also lambasting the corrosion of culture and end of science

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— nilay patel (@reckless.bsky.social) July 18, 2026 at 11:57 AM

(I have no idea what this means, but Stephenson wrote books about techbros devoted to Athena, goddess of high-tech weapons)

The line at the Sam's Club in Hilliard for the Pokémon drop this morning was wild. This is more than an hour before open. pic.twitter.com/4edlmVRI11

— Tyler Sebree ⚡️ (@TylerSebreezy) July 21, 2026

🚨 ONE SCALPER USED 40 SAM’S CLUB MEMBERSHIPS?!

A Central Florida collector created ~40 accounts in line, then had employees load his cart with boxes

leaving 60+ people empty handed

No tickets. No limits. Full membership farming 😭#PokeStreetz #PokemonTCG @PokeWorldStar pic.twitter.com/7CuxgPVeXI

— PokéStreetz (@POKESTREETZ) July 21, 2026

(FWIW didn't see this verified anywhere)

AVENGERS: DOOMSDAY (2026)

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— Alan Sepinwall (@sepinwall.bsky.social) July 21, 2026 at 7:42 AM

genuinly who has it out for her😭 pic.twitter.com/7qTz6jGpNX

— ripley ⚢.𖥔 ݁ ˖🛸── .✦ (@spacephobos) July 20, 2026

Tour de France anti-doping officials visited at least six more teams Monday after overnight tests involving two top riders sparked concerns over rider sleep, recovery, and the extent of doping suspicions.

The ITA said it had roughly 600 tests planned during the three-week race.

— Front Office Sports (@FOS) July 21, 2026

David Beckham: “I’ve only felt nervous once in my career—the Champions League final.”

Zidane: “The bigger the game, the calmer I was.”

Beckham: “I’m changing my answer… I
was never nervous.” 😂 pic.twitter.com/XXnxE3QnZ7

— carter🌚 (@carter8f) July 19, 2026

(Zidane's answer, most of the video, is in french)

All the players were respectfully greeting the King, but Lamine Yamal greeted him like he was greeting a friend 😂😂 pic.twitter.com/MqYVdyRo2y

— Anabella💙❤️ (@AnabellaMarvy) July 20, 2026

Toward the end of the clip

Martin Amis on Argentina’s 1986 World Cup https://t.co/tqh2wJfMaI pic.twitter.com/W9mWDLGh1f

— Aidan McLaughlin (@aidnmclaughlin) July 20, 2026

@gooseymanee Here’s your annual dose of serotonin 🍉 One year ago today, Goose introduced the internet to his watermelon obsession 🍉😂. You all loved it so much that we thought it was only right to bring it back and hopefully brighten your day all over again. 🥲💗🫶🏻 #happydog #cutedog #watermelon #goldenretriever #viralpet ♬ Happy - Pharrell Williams

@zeric.paws.inn This is your sign!🥹❤️ #dogsofinstagram #dog #dogs #dogstagram ♬ original sound - ZERIC PAWS INN

@upworthy Something tells us you made Maria feel just as special as she made him. ♥️ @Trisha Anderson ♬ original sound - Upworthy

*More funny posts.