I love good parking place stories. I LOVE THEM.— Annie Hatfield (@HatfieldAnne) April 10, 2018
Thanks for the retweets. I know you expect me to reciprocate. So you see my dilemma.— Tony™ (@tsm560) April 10, 2018
me any time someone tries to show me a meme on facebook or instagram that i already watched die on twitter: pic.twitter.com/GEupxHBQju— Klaudia Amenábar || #1 Lando Calrissian Stan (@kaludiasays) April 10, 2018
One of my favorite bits of environmental storytelling is when you go to a restaurant and they have shitty soap in a nice soap bottle. Like they cared once and now they’re dead inside. pic.twitter.com/TFrETV7fur— chris person (@Papapishu) March 3, 2018
My mom told me she found an old middle school paper I had written about immigration and The Wall. It is not what I expected it would be. pic.twitter.com/oPt6k0kWja— Nick Breckon (@nickbreckon) March 2, 2018
My impossible dream is to have Magic Man's powers of escaping pic.twitter.com/d1lVisWpst— Sin Vega (@sinisteragent) February 10, 2018
TV show I would watch: Tiny House Year Two— Steve Hely (@helytimes) October 14, 2017
Am I perfect? No. But am I doing the best I can? Also no.— Susie Qsie (@susie_qsie) April 11, 2018
There is no more rewarding expression to see on your child's face than the look of horror when she walks into her classroom and realizes you're there for Career Day— Dan Kois (@dankois) April 13, 2018
A good twist would be if Hope Hicks turned out to be the housekeeper’s lovechild, she said having lost any distinction between real life and ABC.— Emily Nussbaum (@emilynussbaum) April 13, 2018
children are so strange i just had seven (7) young boys on my front porch demanding to see my cat. they had a leader. i opened the door and before i could greet them he said “where’s your cat. i know he’s in there we see him in the windows and he’s real fat.” idk what to do here— ً (@nightfiIm) April 14, 2018