Thought somebody was honestly chasing me home with a flute I was so scared and then I realized it was the wind blowing through the holes of my crutches ahahahahahhahahaha ahahhaahahah ahahhahaah shat it— onion o neill (@geaney_) March 14, 2018
I assume my wife found this in the Trader Joe's aisle labeled "Treats To Haunt Your Dreams." pic.twitter.com/qS636VSG7Y— Joseph Scrimshaw (@JosephScrimshaw) March 15, 2018
FYI I received this email from @venmo asking me about a repayment I'd tried to send to @ganzeer for a purchase we made at a #Persian grocery store in Aurora, CO. This level of surveillance is super unsettling and I'll be closing my venmo account. You might want to do the same. pic.twitter.com/RGPcUk5vRH— Kelsey P. Norman (@kelseypnorman) March 27, 2018
a horror movie about removing your contacts when you're not quite sure if you're wearing contacts— Anthony Oliveira (@meakoopa) March 25, 2018
手袋に興味津々な海外のエビが可愛い pic.twitter.com/AXijt6Ojxd— 海外の万国反応記 (@all_nations2) March 25, 2018
me in 2033: look, if you'd asked me if one of the central things i'd need to work on now is cleaning the filters on the crematorium closest to the plague zone, there's no way i thought that's what i'd be doing— Max Read (@max_read) March 22, 2018
went on tinder during the library workshop and matched with one of these librarians; SOS please send help— Kristen Arnett (@Kristen_Arnett) March 20, 2018
Yeah I'm p good with the old Microsoft Office [i accidentally click the button that makes all the paragraph symbols appear] ah she's fucked— Bea_ker (@bea_ker) March 10, 2017
Just checked into my B&B. There is definitely not human soul trapped in that picture right? pic.twitter.com/xXFcZSrDWq— Captain Awkward (@CAwkward) March 19, 2018