The original 2 point conversion attempt had a personal foul blindside block penalty for 15 yards. Then the additional 30 yards from the two unsportsmanlike penalties. Turns a two point conversion attempt from the 3 yard line to the 48 yard line.
— Sickos Committee (@SickosCommittee) October 31, 2022
Here’s the ejection part for the Akron backup QB at least. https://t.co/Q66Vgu4TvE
— Sickos Committee (@SickosCommittee) October 31, 2022
It’s only fitting that a place as weird and unpleasant as Bagram Airfield would take on a new life for years to come in domestic political discourse completely untethered from the actual circumstances surrounding its (inevitable, under the Doha deal) closure https://t.co/73O4w0RWQB
— Wesley Morgan (@wesleysmorgan) November 1, 2022
Useful headline would be: Politician who wants to ban contraception says children use litterboxes at local elementary schoolI think the DePape dialogue is another example of people speaking different languages. For the most part the "we don't have the whole story" people aren't speaking a literal language but a figurative, emotive one.
— RiggedAndStollenHat (@Popehat) November 1, 2022
/1https://t.co/b7Sm9nBm3N
I don’t even know what “lords and peasants” means in this context 🤣 a verified page isn’t really *that* much different than any other account or maybe I’m not using it correctly. Lol
— philip lewis (@Phil_Lewis_) November 1, 2022
"Lords and peasants" is used exactly same way a wealthy republican landlord calls a barista the elite"priority in replies" is really fucking funny. "hope she sees this" as a service https://t.co/2Qh4rjQKpm
— Bruno 🎄 Dias has been festive for 12 years (@NotBrunoAgain) November 1, 2022
A lot of people think that Twitter will be destroyed by memes and unmoderated toxicity, but I actually don't think that'll happen. Instead it will go out the same way as everything else in America: slow and steady deterioration due to unregulated capitalism and leveraged buyouts
— Jason Schreier (@jasonschreier) November 1, 2022
I assume this is a typo but it's also an accidentally perfect Italian Elon Musk
— Jason Schreier (@jasonschreier) November 1, 2022
I've never seen an ouroboros like thisA truly cursed image pic.twitter.com/GXl58j30UO
— Russell Brandom (@russellbrandom) November 2, 2022
waiting for the exact opportune moment to flip my successful "cats that look like cars" gimmick account (800k followers somehow) into nonstop ads for crypto and dietary supplements
— thinking of becoming a necklace guy (@fart) October 24, 2022
People are like "ugh I'm leaving Twitter" but I just saw a viral thread where someone argued it's classist to know how to boil an egg. You can't put a price on this, you'll have to drag me out
— Katie Notopoulos (@katienotopoulos) November 1, 2022
This is what we're fighting to defend. This is what Musk can never take away from us. Thousands of adults ruthlessly humiliating a silly 22 year-old who got socially brainwashed into applying privilege framework to making grilled cheese
— Jingleghost (@JeremyMonjo) November 1, 2022
why would i pay $8 to get a blue check if i could put a rat next to my name for free???
— alex 🐀 (@tinysnekcomics) November 1, 2022
i’m calling on everyone to join me in becoming #RatVerified
A little-known benefit of having the blue check on Twitter is that Tesla “autopilot” will prioritize your personal safety when the car crashes.
— Michael Zimmer (@michaelzimmer) November 2, 2022
[tesla engineer whispering to twitter engineer] so how do you keep it from catching on fire
— ann hedonia 👻 (@AaronM) October 29, 2022
Q: how soon after Tesla goes bust would the cars stop running?
— Maria, Comrade Ghost (@oberonsghost) November 2, 2022
The reply isn't 100% true, but it's more true than "Mastodon/the fediverse is a good twitter substitute." https://t.co/H84nM64A2s
— John Wiseman (@lemonodor) November 1, 2022
it’s time to return to the sorts of murder stories that don’t feel too weird next to a ford commercial pic.twitter.com/J0e5ZS5tn2
— John Herrman (@jwherrman) October 31, 2022
Come on, Kyrie. At least a Star of David has 6 points
— Randall Stephens (@RolloTomasi3030) November 2, 2022
So do Nets employees have to do anti-harassment training extra often for it to have value in case of litigation? Are they not working in a hostile environment?Sean Marks sitting on the dais: "I typed Ime Udoka into amazon prime." https://t.co/5Rn4BNHheg
— Tom Ley (@ToLey88) November 1, 2022
holy shit https://t.co/PaJDZLpjjv
— Ryan Mac 🙃 (@RMac18) November 1, 2022
*Stephen A Smith voice*
— Ryan Mac 🙃 (@RMac18) November 1, 2022
"BUT!" pic.twitter.com/ORuGdjoMDT
https://t.co/TYH5ETTur9 pic.twitter.com/6I5caCxzUW
— Barry Petchesky (@barry) November 1, 2022
"some players in the sport boil their bags or wash them with vinegar to make them lighter or thinner"Professional cornhole gets hit by cheating scandal | Semafor https://t.co/uFYRiW2T2w
— Ben Smith (@semaforben) November 1, 2022
When men refer to themselves as "alpha males", I hear that in the context of software, where alpha versions are unstable, missing important features, filled with flaws, and not fit for the public.
— Glenn F. Henriksen (@henriksen) October 15, 2022
first base: sex
— Nick (@_nickherman) October 18, 2022
second base: childhood trauma
third base: hanging out before 8pm
The existence of the sundress implies the existence of the moondress
— Alice Lily Kyra (she/fae) (@magicalgirlkyra) October 14, 2022
They should have look-a-likes the way Avengers walk around DisneylandNothing quite like reporting on the opening of the Ghibli Park in Aichi Prefecture and having Miyazaki randomly stride into frame like a slightly-more-in-focus sasquatch.https://t.co/zFuM6pgWJl
— Unseen Japan (@UnseenJapanSite) November 1, 2022
You should be able to race against a Mario Kart ghost of your best time when you go to work
— Ben Crew (@BenjaminCrew1) October 19, 2022
i honestly and truly believe that if you’re famous and you’re not using that fame to meet the muppets or at the VERY least go on sesame street you deserve to have your titles stripped from you
— ellerie (@thewaitrss) October 18, 2022
@itsanniebelle Happy Fall 🍁 🍂 #leafblower #leaf #yardwork #fallcleanup ♬ original sound - ItsAnnieBelle
@rocket.lizard This poor guy just wanted to do his job 😂 #animals #funny #viral #fyp #DidYouYawn ♬ Underwater (From "Banjo-Kazooie Grunty's Revenge") - Arcade Player
*More funny posts.