I’m an deceased.....pic.twitter.com/HvlkK0qWke— EducatëdHillbilly™ (@RobProvince) April 17, 2020
I pulled a clean copy of that ABC7 story. “I feel horrible.” pic.twitter.com/PwiqsM7Pob— dhm (@dhm) April 21, 2020
Even in Pakistan, my name was very uncommon. I loved my name & that it was uncommon.— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) April 18, 2020
Then, in the 6th grade, a new product came on the market & chnged my life forever.
In a very very bad way.
Please watch this commercial. https://t.co/xjgacnpfdc
To help with video conference eye contact I broke into the googly eyes.— Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig) April 17, 2020
Because it’s now always watching me I’ve named the webcam Mark Zuckerbot. pic.twitter.com/z2NQwdZQhU
if you're ever like "my story is dumb and doesn't make sense" remember that the phantom of the opera exists, which is also dumb and makes no sense, but goes extremely hard— punished "homestuck" aysha (@ayshaufarah) April 19, 2020
Ladies, if he's:— Ayn Randy (@ItsAndyRyan) March 24, 2019
- Never where he's supposed to be
...He's not your man. He's an apostrophe
If you can't handle me at what you have mistakenly assumed is my worst, then prepare to be unpleasantly surprised in the immediate future.— 🇺🇸Fránk Whítehouse 🇺🇸 (@WheelTod) September 19, 2017
First-round pocket presence. pic.twitter.com/1FWJWkLduO— ProFootballTalk (@ProFootballTalk) April 22, 2020
I am at war with this squirrel. For the past week he’s decided to make a home in an eave above my ceiling and I can hear his every move. All day. pic.twitter.com/MY5fTy9AlO— Mike Madrid (@madrid_mike) April 20, 2020
This means he wants to be picked up and carried home😂 pic.twitter.com/dRXm21Etki— Ross McCulloch (@Rossmac212) April 20, 2020
*More funny posts.