Today's news and jokes

This bobblehead is so cool, it deserves a plug. Wade 100th splash hit… with actual operating water cannons!

Sunday vs. NYY, first 20,000 fans. #SFGiants ⁦@LEVIS⁩ ⁦@SFGiants⁩ pic.twitter.com/QjSqxJjTQK

— Darren Chan (@415dc) May 29, 2024

Mike Johnson is calling for the Supreme Court to "step in" to overturn the guilty verdict against Trump in his New York hush money trial.

"I know many of them personally – I think they are deeply concerned about that as we are." https://t.co/tyaaQEJGup

— Axios (@axios) May 31, 2024

Neighbors say Alitos used security detail car to intimidate them after flag dispute ⁦@AndrewGumbel⁩ https://t.co/9jckf5CZ5J

— Richard Winton (@LAcrimes) May 31, 2024

give me, hmmm, $5 million a year and I can ensure peace in the Pacific through simply bribing *both* the US admirals and the Chinese ones. https://t.co/O55LFBi9fS

— James Palmer (@BeijingPalmer) June 1, 2024

To be maximally generous here and assume Baker’s defined trauma to mean “millions of Americans are angry,” would he have called it a national trauma if Trump had been acquitted? https://t.co/tp7nUbgDNI

— Brian Beutler (@brianbeutler) May 31, 2024

god damnit im never gonna hear the end of this pic.twitter.com/yMlSlSY8fk

— Sean Morrow (@snmrrw) May 30, 2024

Just to recap:

Donald Trump is a felon

He joins his campaign manager, deputy campaign manager, national security advisor, foreign policy advisor, political consultant, and personal lawyer as felons.

— Stuart Stevens (@stuartpstevens) May 30, 2024

Trump conviction tricky for PRC propagandists. On one hand, highlights a rotting and fracturing democracy. On other hand, highlights that a former top leader can be arrested, put on trial, judged by jury of peers and convicted, for relatively small acts of corruption. Not an…

— Bill Bishop (@niubi) May 30, 2024

The mayor of Fujikawaguchiko concedes the black screen blocking a view of Mt Fuji now has holes, so it will be replaced by a stronger material. He also said black isn't good for the town's image so the new screen might be blue, green, brown or silver. https://t.co/cOH5fK5jvb

— Mulboyne (@Mulboyne) May 30, 2024

Having a bad day at work? At least you weren't one of the window cleaners of the CCTV building just before a storm headed into Beijing...#storm #beijing #quantumentanglement #china pic.twitter.com/KShQOtyVzi

— Tom van Dillen (@vandillenpek) May 30, 2024

(Mike Rowe telling them how noble it is to work under such conditions)

The Tropicana demolition guys found out about the old septic tank underneath the porte cochere the hard way. pic.twitter.com/o2k54m2FSo

— Las Vegas Locally 🌴 (@LasVegasLocally) May 29, 2024

Apparently this is what happened to the 2023 women’s cheese rolling champion.

Love coming in first while unconscious. https://t.co/ynW6IBR9vb pic.twitter.com/sOajwQ0kJS

— 🇲🇨 Sickos Committee 🇲🇨 (@SickosCommittee) May 31, 2024

(Wikipedia)

これで、柴犬が操作するレバー左隣にある ティッシュ箱 のモデル作った時の、参考にした "メーカー" 当てられたら凄いな（笑
※因みに、犬エンド監修 & 柴犬のアニメーションを自分やりましたw https://t.co/mdThBceEkK

— 伊藤暢達/Masahiro Ito (@adsk4) May 31, 2024

(The BBTS has it.)

Wendy's SuperBar placemat, from the late '80s. Individual all-you-can-eat stations for Italian and Mexican cuisine, plus one for salad. Total chaos. Lives were forever changed. pic.twitter.com/PBEuDm2rrx

— Dinosaur Dracula (@DinosaurDracula) April 29, 2024

Anything's pastabale

one of my Dad’s employees asked for their birthday off and my dad said “why? Did your wife get you a clown?” my Dad had to go to a sensitivity class and apologize to him in front of everyone. https://t.co/9RSNjCaIt3

— kyle (@meteormajeure) April 29, 2024

Just saw a man run down an escalator going up, not catch a train going in Largo direction than jump onto the tracks, go across and attach himself onto a train going in Ashburn direction and the train left the station with him hanging on to it @wmata What in spy movie is this? pic.twitter.com/uCRiNovcz9

— Ashkhen Kazaryan (@Ashkhen) April 29, 2024

@hurrdatsports Paul Skenes has a unique warmup before he pitches #paulskenes #mlbdraft #mlbprospects #lsubaseball ♬ original sound - Hurrdat Sports

@hihhique Replying to @ִ ✮🕷✮⋆𝓁𝓍𝓁𝒾𝓃𝒹𝓈𝑒𝓎✮🕷✮⋆ ♬ sunet original - Comedy

@juniperfoxx

Even after 9 years together she still lights up every time she sees him 🤍

♬ original sound - Juniperfoxx

@kendra.luckow Living alongside wildlife can be a fine balance. I always make sure I know where the elephant seals are before I walk along any paths or even go outside. This prevents me from disrupting them (which is my main focus) but it also keeps me safe! *Video zoomed and cropped, never approach wildlife* #elephantseal #safety #marinemammals #troll #lighthousekeeper #fyp #ecoguardian #vancouverisland #animalfacts #elephantsealsoftiktok #elephantseals ♬ original sound - Kendra

@pubity The soap everywhere😭😭 #Pubity ♬ original sound - Pubity

*More funny posts.