Monday, February 24, 2014

Describing the original Star Wars trilogy as an MMO

From the description of Return of the Jedi:

Okay so Luke bought some sweet cartel gear and knows his way around tattooine. He finds Jabbas palace and doesn't mind earning a few dark side points since he heard that Hutts don't fuck around. Unfortunately, he makes the wrong choice in conversation and loses a ton of Hutt Cartel reputation. He manages to get captured, then thrown into a rancor pit, but he finally learned how to use his bubble-ability, and is able to keep himself alive long enough for him to figure out that he can skip the fight if he throws a rock at a computer terminal. After god-knows-how-long he and his friends manage to break the carbonate CC on the smuggler. They earn TONS of dark side points for blowing up a skiff loaded with wealthy people/slaves, and only manage to survive because the power tech used his knock-back effect on himself and ended up in the sarlaac (essentially a REALLY crappy arena mechanic). They all leave together, but luke needs to go weekly events on dagobah for exp+. His mentor there tells him that he's quitting (probably because all of the fucking F2Pers), and warns him that Empire storyline is boring. Luke leaves the planet and joins up with a raid-group who want to take down the shield generator on Endor.