Today's news and jokes

Innovative ‘kiss me’ #JapaneseGP trophies 🏆 💋

Will come alive when picked up in the right spot thanks to touch sensitive technology 👀 pic.twitter.com/wFJA9ZhZTn

— Motorsport.com (@Motorsport) September 23, 2023

#JapaneseGP ‘kiss me’ trophies 🏆💋

📸 @auscarpiastri pic.twitter.com/mbGGokFn31

— Motorsport.com (@Motorsport) September 23, 2023

"The trophy has a special ‘kiss me’ area located on the outside, with indicator lights which will flash when it is picked up to guide drivers to the right spot."

This week's best Warhammer 40k miniatures and other hobby creations

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Today's funny posts

The best part is still how his teammates are too stunned to block for him pic.twitter.com/7nRik4iQ7L

— BUM CHILLUPS AKA SPENCER HALL (@edsbs) November 12, 2021

Algorithm pattern on a dress; Duolingo Owl idol; Small town looks to hire a reporter/concierge

On #D23InsideDisney this week, @TWDCArchives director Becky Cline talks about the detail on Athena’s costume in Tomorrowland. Because she’s an android the detail on her dress is an algorithm! pic.twitter.com/CTl9EX6DK0

— Jeffrey R Epstein (@EpsteinJeffrey) July 27, 2021

Watch this Gal Gadot bust being created; Vinyl Mickey Mouse figure with a mosaic face; Alex Smith's leg brace was transformed into a trophy

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A post shared by 大久保博人 Hiroto Ohkubo (@instinctoy_hiroto_ohkubo)

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A post shared by 🔩🔨🔧📐🔌ThOmAs PaTsIS👓🏁🏆 (@coldhardart)

Rejected Ready Player One theme song; KBO's championship "Execution Sword" is the best kind of product placement; The fighter's paintjob was inspired by Vader's mouth

Just got word that I can finally share my rejected theme song from @readyplayerone. They went with Alan Silvestri's theme, but I still want to thank Steven Spielberg & @WarnerBrosEnt for the wonderful opportunity. pic.twitter.com/aK32ZOUA16

— demi adejuyigbe (@electrolemon) March 7, 2018

What a photo by the Yonhap News on the NC Dinos sword ceremony. #KBO pic.twitter.com/1ylCDn170n

— Sung Min Kim (@sung_minkim) November 24, 2020

KBO sword trophy >>>> World Series trophy. In fact, this may rival anything in sports. pic.twitter.com/bQVOgBiVrD

— Maury Brown (@BizballMaury) November 24, 2020

What an intriguing question- I designed that paint job for Anakin's Starfighter, yes as an homage to his Pod paint job (and eventual Vader's mouth shape)- the blue stripes in the school are inspired from a trip to Italy, tile patterns on the Amalfi Cathedral-

— Ryan Church (@rchurchdesign) November 24, 2020

Speeder Bike/Scout Trooper/Scout Walker concept art by Nilo Rodis-Jamero, Joe Johnston, and Ralph McQuarrie. RETURN OF THE JEDI. The bulk of the work is Johnston’s, who was the chief designer behind the Speeder Bike I believe. pic.twitter.com/kOSs6mpkGU

— WEIRDLAND TV (@WeirdlandTales) November 24, 2020

Yes George Lucas exactly exactly pic.twitter.com/etlGqNNz2u

— Helmetless Chris rewrote Episode IX 🦋 (@reylochriso) November 24, 2020

The MLS trophy didn't show up, so they converted a Captain America shield instead

MLS:

When the Philadelphia Union raised the Supporters’ Shield on Decision Day presented by AT&T, you may have noticed that something looked a little off about the trophy.

That’s because the actual shield didn’t arrive in time from Los Angeles (LAFC won in 2019, mind you), so the club had to get creative. Step in the tale of a Captain America shield, a 150-pound force magnet and Philadelphia’s web manager’s fiancee’s sister’s boyfriend. 

This is the story of how a Captain America shield, complete with 150 lb force magnet, became the Supporters' Shield.

I'm told the true, forged by the supporters Shield didn't arrive from LA in time, so the @PhilaUnion got creative. pic.twitter.com/nld62pyGzi

— Andrew Wiebe (@andrew_wiebe) November 9, 2020

The magnet on the back -- powerful enough for it to stick and hold to the back of the costume, like I said LEGIT -- was so strong the heat guns got stuck to it during the process of applying the vinyl.

End result? F#%&ING AWESOME. pic.twitter.com/HO249A1srO

— Andrew Wiebe (@andrew_wiebe) November 9, 2020

Ten funny tweets

Ya hate to see it #ArmyNavyGame pic.twitter.com/qCUn3JUZqv

— Yahoo Sports (@YahooSports) December 14, 2019

Gourmet Makes is my favorite show about a person taking on too much, getting overwhelmed and dissociating

— Kalhan Rosenblatt (@KalhanR) December 15, 2019

Each year UNC Charlotte and Davidson battle for the Hornets' Nest trophy and honestly I'd rather lose pic.twitter.com/WUGxOLZGUd

— Jonathan Jones (@jjones9) December 12, 2019

i have at least 75 answers to this question, this is one of them https://t.co/1zGgRRVjTv pic.twitter.com/mHxuUOjE5i

— Jon Bois (@jon_bois) December 13, 2019

pic.twitter.com/XazWXTUUPs

— Oh Tumblr (@ohtumblroh) December 14, 2019

the second week of december in nyc is like finals but for your social life

— allisonb (@irl) December 14, 2019

Every Hallmark Christmas movie should have a post-credits scene where the Big City Lawyer and the Small Town Man of Her Dreams discover each other’s voting history.

— Paul Musgrave🍕 (@profmusgrave) December 14, 2019

[ creating bats ]

god: well we already made birds

angel:

god:

angel: what if they were goth

god: omg what IF they were goth tho

— silent nate (@MNateShyamalan) December 12, 2019

pic.twitter.com/5uoPz2cUk7

— Good doggos (@DoggoDating) December 14, 2019

my brother thought it’d be a good idea to tie our dog to the coffee table... pic.twitter.com/zwJGmCYeNL

— v (@vic_luna3) December 14, 2019

*More funny posts.

Ten funny tweets

Thirsty turtle boi gets a back scritch. pic.twitter.com/vY1JrpJElR

— cute n squishy (@_Cute_n_Squish) December 8, 2019

Some of y'all never got free personal pan pizzas from pizza hut for reading and it shows

— The Unconventionalist (@joshthedavid) December 7, 2019

when you're so tired from "all the feels" here's some underwear for you pic.twitter.com/rlW4paT9Yx

— mimi smartypants (@mimismartypants) December 8, 2019

when you're looking at old-ass pictures on your crush's instagram & trying not to "like" anything pic.twitter.com/5lGl1Cnyg1

— priscilla page (@BBW_BFF) December 6, 2016

Think my eldest has been watching old cartoons at his grandmother's place. Currently telling me about how it's really funny when "traffic chicken" goes *Meep Meep* pic.twitter.com/NzjUKZC2Ia

— Excess Pokémon Hype Wookiee (@fancywookiee) December 8, 2019

Peter Fowler with the #MCBTourChamp 🇸🇨 trophy, which is inspired by the coco de mer - Seychelles’ nut - indigenous to the island of Praslin. pic.twitter.com/H437UCrIuq

— Staysure Tour (@StaysureTour) December 7, 2019

Kirby Smart getting wrecked by his own guy 😂😂 pic.twitter.com/W4xyGfrbJH

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) December 7, 2019

i've been laughing at this review of The Knight Before Christmas for like ten minutes pic.twitter.com/cXzfLqAPrd

— C-3PREE-O (Preeti Chhibber) (@runwithskizzers) December 7, 2019

Watch Chip and Jo Gaines discover that there is only one type of roof tile they are allowed to use due to historical heritage regulations, and it must be installed by the village mayor's brother, who also belongs to the Front National. Cash only, please.

— Pinboard (@Pinboard) December 7, 2019

pic.twitter.com/YDjO5GhIVh

— Good doggos (@DoggoDating) December 5, 2019

*More funny posts.

Video game roundup

Samus Aran pic.twitter.com/zHIEAI4YrF

— 🦂 (@ramos_isaak) March 7, 2019

pic.twitter.com/XYDcJMSsYd

— doom_txt (@doom_txt) March 9, 2019

Decided to unwind after today with a few Red Dead Online races. Got put in a lobby with a woman who has a giant brown Belgian. Exactly Hayseed's size. At one point, we collided head on. Our corpses flew in graceful arcs in opposite directions, careening several streets away.

— Cass Marshall (@RequineGG) March 8, 2019

Something possessed me to write this long thing on reddit about my experience with this Barbie game for PS one, sooo I’m just gonna repost it here pic.twitter.com/kZglgCTpLz

— Alexandria 🐱 (@floralcode) February 21, 2019

Custom Phantom Ruby Awards are here! Each features a replica Phantom Ruby and a golden finish base inlaid with 7 transparent chaos emeralds.

The top 3 fastest Sonic Mania players at the @SXSWGaming event this weekend will win them - good luck! pic.twitter.com/hxLeIGKdvA

— Aaron Webber (@RubyEclipse) March 11, 2019

Reaching the milestone while completing the final level of the 'Battlefield V' campaign mode, local man Jacob Dunford also has far more confirmed kills on Nazi troops and has participated in several more significant battles than his grandfather. https://t.co/MRQU1qLiUZ

— The Onion (@TheOnion) March 12, 2019

Street Fighter X Uniqlo collab coming soon! 😱 pic.twitter.com/NlnZN0PWms

— ✨Ricki Sophie Ortiz✨ (@HelloKittyRicki) March 12, 2019

Rich people in China are building this in their houses. I could see this be added in a gym or a game center. pic.twitter.com/PHwCco5uaG

— Carl Zha (@CarlZha) March 11, 2019

*More video games news.

Here's what it looked like when Sean Payton showed the Saints the actual cash they'd win if they win the Super Bowl

You heard the story from @JonDeTrinis of #Saints coach Sean Payton coming into his locker room with armed guards, cash and a Super Bowl trophy as motivation? For the first time, here is what it looked like: pic.twitter.com/DVij0t77z9

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) January 13, 2019

From sources:

Yesterday, 4 armed guards entered the @saints locker room, with Coach @SeanPayton wheeling the Lombardi trophy on top of $225k in cash.

Coach then said: “Y’all want this???”

“Win 3 F’n games.”

The locker room erupted. $225k is each player’s SB bonus. #WHODAT

— Jon DeTrinis (@JonDeTrinis) January 9, 2019

Great interviews with @MarkIngram22 and @RankinsSheldon about Sean Payton bringing in the Lombardi Trophy and $225,000 in cash (accompanied by armed guards) as motivation.
$225,000 would be a players total playoff bonus if they reached the Super Bowl.@wdsu pic.twitter.com/J0mIzb52Ql

— Fletcher Mackel (@FletcherWDSU) January 9, 2019

Move over turnover chain, gymnasts get the stick crown

.@samidurante8 gets her first stick crown on beam! She goes 9.85 in the third spot. pic.twitter.com/JTZdBlRWod

— LSU Gymnastics (@LSUgym) January 5, 2019

Arkansas uses a snout:

I would like to discuss how Arkansas’s version of the “stick crown” is a PIG NOSE ON A NECKLACE pic.twitter.com/H2L9x4hb5Y

— sarah slothanova (@slothanova) January 6, 2019

Trophy featuring alchemist Hennig Brand boiling his own urine in hopes of producing gold

BAHFest:

What are we looking for in specific?
We need short (3-5 minute) funny original presentations in which the speaker gives a fake scientific lecture. The lecture can be on any scientific topic, but it must either propose a hypothesis, suggest a big idea for a scientific project, or describe an experiment. See the video above for an example of a winning talk. If you’ve seen earlier shows, you’ll know we formerly provided a theme for each show. We are now doing all shows in an “open theme” format. In case that’s daunting, here are some writing prompts:

New theories of evolution, human psychology, or animal behavior.
Ways to solve major problems (real or imagined) facing humanity
Ways to use science to improve human life
Proposals for large scale social science experiments
Proposals for “big science” projects, like space missions or the LHC
The speakers will then be asked to “defend” their theories before a panel of judges for 1-3 minutes.

Wikipedia:

Like many before him, he was interested in water (H2O) and tried combining it with various other materials, in hundreds of combinations. He had seen for instance a recipe in a book 400 Auserlensene Chemische Process by F. T. Kessler of Strasbourg for using alum, saltpetre (potassium nitrate) and concentrated urine to turn base metals into silver[citation needed] (a recipe which did not work).

Around 1669 he heated residues from boiled-down urine on his furnace until the retort was red hot, where all of a sudden glowing fumes filled it and liquid dripped out, bursting into flames. He could catch the liquid in a jar and cover it, where it solidified and continued to give off a pale-green glow. What he collected was phosphorus, which he named from the Greek word for "light-bearing" or "light-bearer."

Phosphorus must have been awe-inspiring to an alchemist: it was a product of man, and seeming to glow with a "life force" that did not diminish over time (and did not need re-exposure to light like the previously discovered Bologna Stone). Brand kept his discovery secret, as alchemists of the time did, and worked with the phosphorus trying unsuccessfully to use it to produce gold.

Move over touchdown chain, here's the touchdown hat

The Gophers apparently have a derby hat for TDs and I need some tea pic.twitter.com/2nRlWWimoJ

— CJ Fogler (@cjzer0) October 6, 2018

Ten funny tweets

Imagine living in NYC during its most exciting era, in the age of the Cash Cab

— Josh (@JoshGelfat) September 10, 2018

"Clemson student Harris Roberts could start at quarterback for Furman"

GO:

Furman, a liberal arts institution, was the only Division I school to offer Roberts a football scholarship, but it could not offer an engineering degree.

...

Roberts is enrolled in a cooperative educational exchange program that allows students to play at one school while pursuing their desired degree at another. Roberts earned a bachelor’s degree in pre-engineering from Furman in three years. He is scheduled to earn a second bachelor’s from Clemson in mechanical engineering.

And some early highlights:

Ole Miss WRs now have the “Nasty Wide Outs” belt: #HottyToddy #MISSvsTTU pic.twitter.com/69xZwwij8W

— RedditCFB (@RedditCFB) September 1, 2018

he got got by the referee 😂 pic.twitter.com/6oYHPu7u2M

— FOX College Football (@CFBONFOX) September 1, 2018

The White Sox have a home run chain

Nicky Delmonico homers again. Tim Anderson presents him with the White Sox home run chain. pic.twitter.com/EvmEXZEJOM

— Chuck Garfien (@ChuckGarfien) August 22, 2018

"The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald…Trophy"

Athletic:

The Great Lakes Freighter Trophy, an unwieldy hunk of bronze nicknamed “The Barge” by Cleveland Browns writers, had spent years gathering dust in the Browns’ media room. Commissioned in 2002 by one-time Browns CEO Carmen Policy as a prize for a preseason rivalry game with the Detroit Lions, The Barge was apparently decommissioned in secret.

During last season’s training camp, Cleveland.com Browns writer Scott Patsko asked his readers what the team should do with the derelict ship. By the end of the season, he realized it was gone. [p]

How did a massive bronze sculpture commissioned by an NFL team just disappear? Where did the big ship go—and how did it get built in the first place?

Ten funny tweets

I just remembered I once made an account on Twitter I claimed was a "crush bot" and if you DMd it your crush, and that person also did, it would tell both of you. But it wasn't a bot, it was just me reading the DMs.

— Katie Notopoulos (@katienotopoulos) May 22, 2018

This week I’ve been observing a sinkhole on the @WhiteHouse North Lawn, just outside the press briefing room, growing larger by the day. pic.twitter.com/BsFUtxFqpB

— Steve Herman (@W7VOA) May 22, 2018

They put a lid on the great White House sinkhole pic.twitter.com/sG9e8PlGp9

— Steve Holland (@steveholland1) May 22, 2018

What’s the weirdest #StarWars picture you have saved on your phone? pic.twitter.com/x9vcPHE8La

— Chris J. Allan (@chrisjallan) May 22, 2018

the queen getting excited about cows is my favourite video in this world pic.twitter.com/mGZtobbcqG

— H (@hannahdxlano) May 20, 2018

Texas is wild y'all pic.twitter.com/t8egToCrvE

— David Silva Jr (@silvadjr_94) May 22, 2018

I bought a car today, and the dealership had me check off — with a pen, on paper — that I’m not a robot. pic.twitter.com/x6nJ68e6uj

— Marci Robin (@MarciRobin) May 20, 2018

This is literally the cutest thing I've seen all day! My heart ❤️😭 pic.twitter.com/r5tSQzPk44

— Erin 💙 (@iamErin_Nicole) May 22, 2018

Okay seriously: who the hell drew these box arts and why do they keep writing Splurp pic.twitter.com/tKXBdu1oDc

— Chris Kohler (@kobunheat) May 22, 2018

Whose face is this on Brandi Chastain's hall of fame plaque? https://t.co/WmRLCq04LN pic.twitter.com/7pCqVb4wVY

— Deadspin (@Deadspin) May 22, 2018

Like a boss. pic.twitter.com/zy5GY37Vkt

— ערבי ותו לא! (@arbiv2lo) May 21, 2018

"The N.F.L. will present its Walter Payton Man of the Year award on Saturday...The winner gets a trophy. But it is not of Payton."

NYT:

Instead, it’s of an obscure 6-foot-6-inch, 250-pound offensive tackle who modeled for it when it was originally sculptured in 1969. His name is Steve Wright.

“I’m the poster boy for being in the right place at the right time,”