Wednesday, January 14, 2026

Today's news and jokes

what fresh hell is this on the streets of brooklyn?

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— Philip Gourevitch (@pgourevitch.bsky.social) January 9, 2026 at 1:33 PM
Real product from what I could tell





Musk's Starlink has ~9,000 satellites in orbit. China is filing paperwork for ... 200,000 satellites. spacenews.com/china-files-...

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— Noah Shachtman (@noahshachtman.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 1:53 PM


NEW: Moscow is waging a war of cyberattacks and military incursions against tiny Estonia, a former Soviet republic turned NATO member, whose citizens fear a major conflict is brewing, reports Floriana Bulfon from Tallinn for @newlinesmag.bsky.social. newlinesmag.com/reportage/ho...

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— New Lines Magazine (@newlinesmag.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 6:16 AM




(Read the community notes)

("In short, the Venezuelan military’s incompetence appears to have played a big role in the U.S. success. Venezuela’s much-touted antiaircraft systems were essentially not connected when U.S. forces entered the skies over Venezuela’s capital, and they may not have been working for years")









Two Target employees forced to the ground, then into SUV, then dumped in different parking lot

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— Guardian US (@us.theguardian.com) January 13, 2026 at 1:29 PM


Yes, immigration agents not only took Arnoldo's phone, the 10th grader had to use Find My Phone to locate it — in a vending machine for used electronics, close to an ICE detention center. Read the full story here: www.propublica.org/article/vide...

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— ProPublica (@propublica.org) January 13, 2026 at 4:47 PM


A St. Paul resident says federal officers knocked on her door and asked her to identify Hmong and Asian households in her North End neighborhood last week.

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— Chicago Tribune (@chicagotribune.com) January 13, 2026 at 10:07 AM


"i serve the Lord, not a draft-dodging coward" is the kind of phrase that would be slightly cringe online and is incredibly badass when being stated by a man surrounded by armed men threatening to murder him

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— Robert Evans (the Only Robert Evans) (@iwriteok.bsky.social) January 13, 2026 at 1:47 PM


























("In danger though is India’s use of the strategically-located Chabahar port on Iran’s south western coast that serves as a gateway to reach markets in Afghanistan and Central Asia")

lollllllll www.politico.com/news/2026/01...

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— Elise Thomas (@elisethomas.bsky.social) January 13, 2026 at 3:01 PM
"Iran’s oil industry, despite being ravaged by years of U.S. sanctions, is still considered to be structurally sound, unlike that of Venezuela’s.")









This appeared in the Globe's Rhode Island news this morning. www.bostonglobe.com/2026/01/12/m...

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— Sam G. Howard (@samghoward.riliberator.com) January 12, 2026 at 11:27 AM
("One way to think about prediction markets is as an efficient way to transfer wealth from suckers to inside traders")

It's actually kind of striking how rapidly the ads on ostensibly respectable platforms have changed in the last 12–18 months. I've been getting penis enlargement scams and pyramid schemes that don't even bother to pretend to be otherwise on YouTube. (1/2)

— David J Prokopetz (@prokopetz.bsky.social) January 11, 2026 at 5:08 PM
It's a free speech violation to stop grifters from fleecing suckers

Fun twist: the guy who started the one super PAC that contributed to Andrew Cuomo when he made his last-minute appeal to crypto bros is now accusing Adams of stealing the NYC Token idea. He says he pitched Adams on the idea in June, though it doesn't sound like it was focused on antisemitism then.

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— Molly White (@molly.wiki) January 13, 2026 at 2:59 PM
Are there any real gamblers on these things, or is just money laundering? (In other words today, "Former aide to Eric Adams arrested on federal bribery charges")







🙃

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— David Ingram (@davidingram.bsky.social) January 13, 2026 at 9:13 AM


over on twitter people are attacking and doxxing the reporter for People who wrote this. i really hope she's doing okay because "disgraced" is really not that out of pocket for an article like this: people.com/scott-adams-...

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— gwen howerton (@kissphoria.bsky.social) January 13, 2026 at 9:11 AM


One time my dad's friend came over when I was like 11 and I was in the living room just reading a Dilbert anthology cover to cover, and my dad's friend was like "Why are you reading every strip in that Dilbert anthology? You're not laughing at all" and it was like he lifted a curse off me

— Corey They Them Brickley (@coreybrickley.bsky.social) January 13, 2026 at 9:08 AM


I don't know if a lot of people know he had an email newsletter early on (mid 90s) and people sent him real anecdotes of wild corp policy and it got big because it really resonated with people fed up with corp culture. I think he went wrong thinking he was the source and not the conduit of wisdom

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— Christina Holland (@mortalwombat.info) January 13, 2026 at 8:41 AM


If there’s a better obituary for an evil cartoonist than an A.I. generated version of his character that fucks up the defining detail of its design, I can’t think of it. No notes. 👨🏻‍🍳 💋

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— Daniel Kibblesmith (@kibblesmith.com) January 13, 2026 at 10:47 AM
(I had to look it up--he shouldn't have a mouth. Never understood Dilbert's success) (Also)







what do you mean the stranger things documentary shows them writing the script on a computer with 3 chat gpt tabs open

— Boto (@boto.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 7:34 AM

bro

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— Boto (@boto.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 7:36 AM
Two discussions. (I tapped out halfway through season 2.)







Maybe I'm misreading Disney's stock price over the last five years







Never heard of this before--right by Universal Studios































And not just a pick six: a pick six that ended in Rodgers himself blowing a tackle, allowing the defense to score that pick six. Could not have happened to a worse person.

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— Giovanni Colantonio (@marioprime.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 8:16 PM


Based on both EPA per pass play and success rate, that Aaron Rodgers performance was the worst by a QB in a playoff game over the last 10 seasons. Just as dominant of a defensive showing as you'll ever see from the Texans tonight.

— Sheil Kapadia (@sheilkapadia.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 8:32 PM
Ok, one more























@runningchannel

A 2 minute and 42 second lift down to the start of the world’s deepest marathon…

♬ Elevator - Beachcrimes & Tia Tia
Official site







@reuters The CEO of Happy Returns, a UPS-owned company that processes boxless returns, explains how they are testing an AI fraud-detection tool this holiday season with a handful of clients including apparel sellers Everlane, Revolve, and Under Armour. #ai #ups #holidayreturns #fraud #shopping ♬ original sound - Reuters








@martinocampok These people can’t see nothing #WWE #survivorseries #wwesurvivorserieswargames #johncena ♬ WWE: The Time Is Now (John Cena) - WWE & John Cena & Tha Trademarc








@espn (via @Butler Blue IV) #espnsocial #mbb #basketball #dog #dogtok ♬ Twinkling Lights - Auni








@moose.milo.friend POV: your dog disappears underground…and no one knows what he did down there 🫣 #dachshundsoftiktok #doxiesoftiktok #dogsoftiktok #dachshundlife #dogrescue ♬ Welp, Didn't Expect That - Yu-Peng Chen & HOYO-MiX




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