Actual thing I just said out loud to my dog: “Ok, let’s take your toy into the bedroom so we can read about Scott Pruitt.”— Emily Anthes (@EmilyAnthes) July 6, 2018
wife: i see you’re still upset I called you dramatic— brent (@murrman5) June 26, 2018
me focusing a microscope: can’t talk too busy looking for an apology
Boogie took his Kentucky salary to play for Golden State.— Bakari Sellers (@Bakari_Sellers) July 3, 2018
Lance Stephenson having a brother named Lantz Stephenson is one of the four most normal things about this Lakers roster.— Dan Woike (@DanWoikeSports) July 2, 2018
When you renounce Julius Randle. pic.twitter.com/Z6ov3zSIaC— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) July 2, 2018
@UniWatch saw this modified Jordan logo used on a construction trailer in ND pic.twitter.com/M8hfU82vEA— Jason Simpfenderfer (@jsimpfenderfer) July 2, 2018
My man pic.twitter.com/isDZqJNdzc— Dingbattitude! 🐻💙 (@VamonosLA) July 2, 2018
I just had a 10-min conversation with an amex representative during which she only called me Ms. Gizmodo— kelly bourdet (@kellybourdet) June 29, 2018
Shrug emoji, paleontology edition 🦖— Emma Hollen (@Emma_Hollen) June 29, 2018
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ pic.twitter.com/ch1GHTWu8F
CW/// moro scratched my sister VERY BADLY this morning when getting her into her carrier so my sister just made this... bandage... which she’s calling the “daddy long-aid” pic.twitter.com/WJ3r4JHfDj— Danika Harrod (@danikaharrod) June 29, 2018
Watching Batman Ninja, Bruce Wayne’s feudal Japan disguise is a Jesuit priest with a bat shaved into the bald spot. pic.twitter.com/Oyenho2gxC— Minovsky (@MinovskyArticle) July 2, 2018