Super Punch: Today's news and jokes

Tuesday, May 5, 2026

Today's news and jokes

The video has sparked discussion, especially as students and parents ignore the rules and insist on eating by the fence, even though the school discourages it. Is the cafeteria food really that bad? In reality, it likely has more to do with parental love. In response, some… pic.twitter.com/W2oVdtHCTH
— Manya Koetse (@manyapan) May 3, 2026

NEW: Russia has sharply tightened security around Putin as fears rise of an assassination attempt involving drones, sources say. He’s often in underground bunkers micromanaging the Ukraine invasion and has grown more detached from civilian affairs. https://t.co/zryNyxwRoR
— max seddon (@maxseddon) May 4, 2026

A Ukrainian drone hit a residential building in Moscow’s posh Mosfilm neighborhood (just 6 km from the Kremlin), which also hosts several foreign embassies, including Germany’s, successfully making its way through all the 'Pantsir' rings. https://t.co/nE4KHxERpN pic.twitter.com/t4wsBO0Z1d
— Mark Krutov (@kromark) May 4, 2026

A drone hit a residential tower in an upscale Moscow district in a rare strike near the city center ahead of the traditional World War II Victory Day parade https://t.co/pOQI9ij2h7
— Bloomberg (@business) May 4, 2026

Taiwan Outfoxes China in Test of Wills Over Tiny African Country—Leader scores a point in battle for recognition, surfacing in Eswatini despite Beijing’s objections@joyuwang https://t.co/4gWXOLfPlB https://t.co/4gWXOLfPlB
— Jonathan Cheng (@JChengWSJ) May 3, 2026

Lai’s chartered plane would be unable to fly directly to landlocked Eswatini, the sole African nation among Taipei’s 12 diplomatic allies. Then, Lai flipped the script, announcing that, after a clandestine maneuver, he had arrived. He didn’t say how.https://t.co/4gWXOLfPlB
— Jonathan Cheng (@JChengWSJ) May 4, 2026

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— gwent champ (@gwentchamp.bsky.social) May 4, 2026 at 5:48 AM

@catalinacrew Over 150 abandoned vessels in Marina del Rey and growing every day. And likely thousands more across marinas throughout California. This week, the California Boating Congress is taking place in Sacramento where we’ll be working to connect, collaborate, and push forward real solutions to help address the abandoned vessel crisis. As redevelopment begins, this is our opportunity to build larger slips and modern docks that match where the boating industry is headed. It’s time to plan for the future of Hollywood Harbor. Through the Catalina Crew Foundation, we’re actively working on solutions to help remove and responsibly dispose of abandoned and derelict vessels. #boat #abandoned #salvage #california #help ♬ เสียงต้นฉบับ - John (Songs Station) - user52912547838

GameStop should buy Spirit and use the planes as PSA submission centers.
— Will Stern (@Will__Stern) May 4, 2026

Trump asked Sean Hannity to serve as his intermediary in getting John Fetterman to switch parties, according to Politico. Hannity then conveyed Trump's offer of "more money than he ever dreamed of" to Fetterman the next day on his podcast. www.politico.com/news/magazin...

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— Justin Baragona (@justinbaragona.bsky.social) May 4, 2026 at 8:15 AM

(the article cites a single unidentified "senior republican" to claim Fetterman is considering the change)

While the world’s eyes are on fashion’s biggest night, we’re turning ours to the garment, retail, and warehouse workers who keep the industry running. From true love found on the picket line to a free tailoring school out of a Brooklyn basement — meet the New Yorkers who make it all possible.

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— Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani (@mayor.nyc.gov) May 4, 2026 at 6:30 PM

It’s sooooooo weird!!! I think because the show is so technical and they don’t get into the nitty gritty of the relationship drama, these people are just making shit up! They want what the show isn’t going to provide them, so I don’t know why they keep watching!!
— Katie C (@ktdoesitbest) May 3, 2026

What type of water filter does Ant have in his house?! https://t.co/8phIG1pitZ
— Nolan (@NolanPeterson35) May 4, 2026

this is a really funny graphic for when they lose

insane campaign https://t.co/kR7tFrNAkl
— A:A (@Swarlayzers) May 4, 2026

When the thing that sounds kinda good on the Mexican restaurant menu is called “The Gringo” :/
— Jack (@HoeannaNewsom) April 19, 2026

Shared Birdwatching pic.twitter.com/HCAVVg1QJ3
— GiGadgets (@gigadgets_) April 19, 2026

rescuing a moose then wrapping him up in blankets in your front yard so he can recover must be one of the most canadian things possible www.cbc.ca/news/canada/...

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— Not That Rick Scott 🇨🇦 (@shadowspar.bsky.social) April 28, 2026 at 8:06 PM