Monday, May 4, 2026

Today's news and jokes

Asked about superstitions Udonis Haslem says he puts his pants on right leg first and shoes right foot first because he wants to do things the right way

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— CJ Fogler (@cjzero.bsky.social) May 1, 2026 at 10:17 PM






"On Polymarket, the Journal found, 67% of profits go to just 0.1% of accounts. That means less than 2,000 accounts netted a total of nearly half a billion dollars."

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— Matt Novak (@paleofuture.bsky.social) May 3, 2026 at 6:29 PM
Bangkok Post (This seems to be an article posted today, with little to no foundation, and includes this line: “He is doing more to help Ukraine than Biden ever did”)

Three passengers dead, one case of hantavirus confirmed from Atlantic cruise ship, WHO says reut.rs/4dlO5bF

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— Reuters (@reuters.com) May 3, 2026 at 1:40 PM
("The MV Hondius, which was carrying about 150 passengers from various countries, left Ushuaia in Argentina about three weeks ago for the Canary Islands, stopping in mainland Antarctica, the Falkland Islands, South Georgia, Nightingale Island, Tristan, St. Helena, Ascension and Cape Verde...a family of viruses that are carried by rodents")

In the DS9 episode Take Me Out to the Holosuite, they made Rom left handed because his actor, Max Grodenchik, played baseball in college and in the minor leagues. He couldn't make his body play baseball badly, so they had him play with his off hand so Rom could be convincingly bad at the game.

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— Kaoru Negisa (@moonpanther22.bsky.social) April 30, 2026 at 6:19 PM

What’s the funniest real-world advertising slogan to imagine Don Draper coming up with? Right now for me it’s “A cookie is just a cookie. But Newtons are fruit and cake.”

— K. Thor Jensen (@kthorjensen.bsky.social) May 2, 2026 at 9:50 AM

(vividly remembering accidentally killing his CO in Korea, assuming his identity and using it to forge a glittering new life yet being forever haunted by his past): “What would YOU do for a Klondike bar?”

— David Singer (@davidsinger.bsky.social) May 2, 2026 at 10:17 AM

I spent thousands of dollars filling my Airbnb with deadly soccer-themed traps in preparation for the World Cup. Now it looks like I may have to settle for a pulse-pounding duel with life-or-death stakes between me and someone who is just in town for business and doesn't get how clever it all is

— michael lutz (@ztul.bsky.social) May 2, 2026 at 6:38 AM

Buffalo Hunt, by John Dare Howland, 1868

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— ArtButMakeItSports (@artbutmakeitsports.bsky.social) May 2, 2026 at 12:19 PM

Charles is pissed

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— CJ Fogler (@cjzero.bsky.social) May 3, 2026 at 10:47 AM
(Fallon asks "Can I get anything for you?," Brundle replies, "I need some funny lines," and Fallon responds by biting off his microphone sock)























@groomington Just can’t get enough 🥹 #petgrooming #groomington #emotionalsupport #dogsoftiktok #groomingtoncoatfactory ♬ Just Can’t Get Enough - The Black Eyed Peas




*More funny posts.
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