this is so funny pic.twitter.com/nsrilmK2bf
— Brenna White (@BonniePuns) May 9, 2021
Look, you are asking to secure oil pipelines, but we don't even have a representative government responsive enough to end daily harassment of its entire citizenship by robots selling auto warranties. The only thing we know how to do in America is land rockets standing up.
— SwiftOnSecurity (@SwiftOnSecurity) May 15, 2021
Saw an apartment block today called Random Koishikawa. Sounds like the name of a psychopathic killer in a Tarantino film. pic.twitter.com/Dee5UgvAk7
— Mulboyne (@Mulboyne) May 4, 2021
You ever cut open a container of tofu and let all the juice drain out? Pretty sure that's exactly how it feels to slit a throat and it haunts me.
— WowJohnWow (@JohnWilinski) May 7, 2021
— Meatloaf Crunch (@yosoymichael) May 10, 2021
I purposely walk slow as shit when it’s raining just to let everybody know what I stand for
— TRENT? (@trentylocks) May 8, 2021
when i was 19 i was very nervous to tell my mom i had spent most of my savings on a baby hedgehog and built it up so much that she interrupted me to tell me she would love and support me no matter who i was or who i loved and that's when i realized she thought i was coming out
— caroline conrad (@CPConrad) May 10, 2021
my favorite erroneous data/outlier story:
— jorbs (@JoINrbs) May 8, 2021
uncle was running a study on fish and had students helping note down behavioral data. everyone's collecting data, it all looks pretty consistent, all good.
turns out: because she's the shortest in the group, she's the only one the fish don't all immediately notice when she comes in to take readings on them in their tank. everybody else is taking readings on stressed out fish, she's taking readings on undisturbed fish.
— jorbs (@JoINrbs) May 8, 2021
*More funny posts.